The Three Whiskers

Kiki is the tuxedo cat, which makes her the only guest who is properly dressed for the office party. Every drink is stirred, formal, and slightly judgmental.

• Midnight Mass Manhattan$42

  Ben Holladay bourbon, Noilly Prat Rouge, Angostura and orange bitters, Luxardo cherry

  Dark, dressy, and out past curfew. Kiki has never once been late.

• Lump of Coal Martini$38

  Stolichnaya vodka, Mr Black cold brew liqueur, Kahlúa, chocolate bitters

  The naughty list’s favorite drink. Smooth, black, and delivered by Kiki.

• Maple Mistletoe Old Fashioned$44

  Buffalo Trace bourbon, demerara syrup, Angostura and chocolate bitters, maple smoke

  Smoked at the table with maple chips. Kissing under it is optional and at your own risk.

• The Bing Crosby Boulevardier$40

  Buffalo Trace bourbon, Campari, Noilly Prat Rouge, cherry smoke

  Dreaming of a white Christmas, drinking a very red one.

• The Black Tie Sidecar$64

  Rémy Martin 1738 cognac, Cointreau, lemon

  Formal wear, formal pricing. If you have to ask, Kiki has already looked down at you.

Telo is the tailless brown tabby, and this is his idea of a white Christmas: sand, rum, and zero snow shoveling. Every drink is a tiki classic in a Santa hat.

• Mele Kalikimaka Mai Tai$38

  Plantation 3 Stars rum, dark rum float, Liber almond orgeat, Ferrand Dry Curaçao, lime

  The official greeting of the lounge. Santa has been told to knock first.

• Blue Christmas$38

  Plantation 3 Stars rum, Blue Curaçao, pineapple juice, cream of coconut, lime

  Elvis would approve, and so would a tailless cat on a warm beach.

• Jingle Bird$36

  Dark rum, Campari, pineapple juice, lime, demerara syrup

  Bitter, tropical, and staring at the Christmas tree with predatory interest.

• The Sleigh-ombie$44

  Plantation 3 Stars rum, dark rum, Stiggins’ Fancy pineapple rum, orange juice, pineapple juice, lime, Velvet Falernum, grenadine, Angostura

  Santa’s official tiki bomb. Limit two, per ancient tiki law and per Telo.

• Frosty the Colada$36

  Plantation 3 Stars rum, Malibu, cream of coconut, pineapple juice, Luxardo cherry

  Smooth, creamy, and melts the moment you look away.

Lexi is the medium-hair brown tabby who haunts the hallway at 3 AM like a Dickens spirit with a grudge. Every drink is pale, smoky, or visiting from another year.

• Marley’s Ghost$36

  Bombay Sapphire gin, Cointreau, lemon

  Pale, sharp, and dragging chains through the hallway all night.

• Scrooge’s Reviver$38

  Bombay Sapphire gin, Cointreau, Lillet, lemon

  Raises the dead and softens the heart. Results may vary by Scrooge.

• Ghost of Christmas Present Apple Mule$34

  Jack Daniel’s Apple, ginger beer, lime, Angostura

  Warm company, cold glass. Tiny Tim approves, as does Lexi.

• Frost on the Window$30

  Presidential white porto, tonic, lemon peel

  See-through, chilled, and unbothered, like Lexi when you call her name.

• Ghost of Christmas Yet-to-Come$40

  Bombay Sapphire gin, Martini Extra Dry vermouth, oak smoke

  Silent, hooded, and extremely dry. Lexi will point at your glass and say nothing.

The old standards, checked twice by Santa. The recipes are the same. Only the names got festive.

• The Red Nose Negroni$36

  Bombay Sapphire gin, Campari, Noilly Prat Rouge

  Bright red, a little bitter, and it will guide your sleigh tonight.

• The Frostbite Margarita$34

  Camarena Silver tequila, Cointreau, Blue Curaçao, lime

  Arctic blue and sharp enough to wake the elves.

• The Mistletoe Daiquiri$30

  Plantation 3 Stars rum, lime, simple syrup

  Three ingredients, one kiss, and zero commitment.

• Dark ’n Sleigh-y$32

  Dark rum, ginger beer, lime

  A Dark ’n Stormy pulling a sleigh through a blizzard.

• Rudolph’s Mule$30

  Tito’s vodka, ginger beer, lime

  Stubborn, cold, and it glows when you’re not looking.

• Paper Plane (Santa’s Flight)$36

  Buffalo Trace bourbon, Aperol, Cipriani amaro, lemon

  Airborne until a cat swats it off the counter.

• The Jolly Whisker Sour$34

  Buffalo Trace bourbon, lemon, simple syrup, grenadine float

  A whiskey sour in a red suit. Ho ho hold on.

• The Amaretto Sour (Naughty List)$30

  Disaronno, lemon, simple syrup, Luxardo cherry

  Sweet, sour, and permanently on the list.

For the designated driver, the designated sleigh pilot, and anyone Lexi has already haunted.

• The Rudolph Shirley Temple$12

  Ginger beer, grenadine, lime, Luxardo cherry

  A red-nosed classic with a cherry on its snout.

• Elf Punch$12

  Liber passionfruit syrup, orange juice, lime, club soda

  Sweet, fizzy, and mildly chaotic, like a workshop on deadline.

• Virgin Frosty Colada$12

  Pineapple juice, cream of coconut, lime, club soda

  All the snowman, none of the proof.

• Snowmelt$8

  Club soda and a frosted lime

  Yes, we charge for this.

• Tonic or Ginger Beer$9

  Poured over ice, with lime

  Served with a stare.

The fine print

• Please drink responsibly. The cats are always watching, and so is Santa.
• No refunds on coal.
• Ordering from the Locked Cabinet requires a co-signer, a lawyer, and a very good reason.
• Management is three cats and cannot be reached for comment.
• The house is not liable for knocked-over trees or spilled drinks. The cats usually caused them.